Anytime I go to review a page and in the introduction there is a statement that they are in the top 0.1% on the site, I have certain expectations. I expect a level of smut and high quality that one would expect on a professional page like PornHub or XNXX. And then I realize that the model in question is a biggie bag of Latina goodness with a booty so phat, that it could solve racism in some small Southern communities. Luna Skye (@viplunaskye) already has me hyped to explore this page and I truly hope I ain’t disappointed by what I find.
Sub price: $3 ($3.25 after tax)
Regular subscription price: $30 a month
CONTENT: 2/5
When it comes to being one of the most beautiful women to ever exist, Luna has no problem qualifying for the title. The first post was made on April 13, 2023. Lately, I really like going to the first post and then working forward so I can see how much the page has grown since it first began. When it first began, it was nothing more than a hot girl Instagram account. Three different poses in a hot pink bikini would account for three posts. 15 pictures in a matching black bra and panties? Check. No nudity. No porn. Just a hot lady being a hot lady. Some days, she would make multiple posts of the same outfit in different poses. And for the most part, the page is a rinse and repeat of this. There ain’t no way this is the top page on Only Fans. If this is what is getting guys’ engines running, they are truly in trouble as a sex and generation of men. I was more excited for the Moana 2 trailer that was playing in the background during the Alabama / Oklahoma game. I had scrolled through the first 8 months of the page (April 2023 until December 2023 and there was one post where we saw her naked butt. That was the closest the page had gotten to nudity. I scrolled back to the top of the page to read the introduction again. There the page said the following:
“Also, I’m all about variety, baby! 💋
I’ve got full-length vids and nudes, fresh content daily 📽️🔥
Solo, SUPER explicit contents, fetishes, kinks, anal, mind-blowing BJs, vid calls, and much more!”
She must be talking about somebody else’s page because none of that was on display on this page. I went back to read her introduction again…
“I’ve got all the XXXX-rated goodies here on my page, and guess what?
I absolutely love using my plump lips to SUCK SOME COCK”
Again, none of this is on display in the feed. This is feeling like the biggest bait and switch I have seen in awhile. This is one of the worst offenders of this scam. And if this wasn’t bad enough, Luna has the audacity to offer a Lifetime VIP package. Supposedly for $200, you get dick rating, priority DM, free naughty surprise, exclusive content and access to all of her naughtiest content. Based on the feed so far, I would rather quit porn and use the $200 toward the purchase of a PS5.
CONNECTION 1/5
I went to the DMs to see if my disappointment would continue. There was a welcome offer for $8.69 that contained 16 pictures and 18 videos but there was nothing to say what the length of those videos were. At this price, it is most likely just Snapchat / reels length and a few seconds at best. So I put my money where my mouth was and discovered a treasure trove of craptacularness. First video – 8 seconds long, posing in a red bikini. Second video – 8 seconds long, dressed as a slutty police officer. Third video – 10 seconds long, cow print bikini. Not one ounce of nudity in any of it. I will not spend another dime on this waste of my time. I will never get the 26 seconds back that I spent watching those three videos. I would rather have those back to use to breath my last breath on my deathbed.
Then there was another offer for something called the “TITTY XXX BUNDLE”. It appeared to contain 10 titty fetish tapes, 20 perky boob pics for $13.69 and it would only be available for the next 8 hours. I promise that I won’t be purchasing it at all.
PERSONALIZED CARE 1/5
It is pretty apparent this is a predatory page only out to make as much money as they can for offering absolutely nothing. By this point, I’m ready to finish the review and issue my first negative review. But I had to push forward and be professional and ask the model about personalized content. I begrudgingly went to the DMs to ask if they offered custom videos and cost and this is where I was done with this page. She proceeds to tell me that she does custom videos for $150 to $200 per minute at a minimum of 3 minutes! One of us is out of our damn minds if you think I am going to spend $450 to $600 to get a custom video from someone I haven’t even seen naked in what I have purchased. Let’s go ahead and get this over with and finish this nightmare review.
CONCLUSION
If you have ever read any of my reviews, I find that I unapologetically make excuses for pages and explain why I would or wouldn’t subscribe to a page. But this is the first time that I will say that not only do I abhor this page, I wish I could give it a bad Yelp review and a bad mark at the Better Business Bureau. There is nothing on this page that was promised in the introduction and amounts to some hot chick milking simps for their hard earned dollars and offering nothing in return This was the worst page I have had the displeasure of having to review because I know there is going to be somebody who clicks on this page and has no idea what they are getting into. I hope people read this review and share it so that no one ever falls for the deceptive practices of this page. I actually hope Luna see’s it and reconsiders her business practices but I’m sure she is making bank and ain’t about to change a thing when there are people out there who are willingly lining up to subscribe to this waste of time. My experience with this page was so awful that it makes me not want to review another page or spend a dime on content for you guys. Buyer beware but if you’re smart, this page is a total skip.
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